SO .. the birthday night is over .. as I have shed as much tearsas when u once told me that you want us to leave eachother. But of course this time it's a different type of tears, those are tears of missing you, loving you, wanting you beside me. Maybe they are also tears of feeling that i didnt do enough for your birthday. ANyways, dont worry, things are still comming up, you think that it will end so simply over the MSN ?? you are mistakenn ..

Do you know that I tear whenever i get a nice word from you! I start thinking, if rasha has such nice things to say, WHYYYY THE HELL DOESNT SHE SAY THEM! She wait so long before saying anything nice. What bothers me more, is that you find it much much muuuchhh easier to say tough words, words that make me feel as if i am being stabbed into my heart. I was going to ask you one question before you leave, but I couldnt catch you. my question was : Would you really forget me easily the second day in case we break up ? Well .. this is what you said many times, and yes it BOTHERS! I wonder how romantic is this sentence to be said to your boyfriend. I know that you dont mean it, but if you got the power to say such stuff, why dont you use that power to say some better stuff, some words to make me feel special, some words to make me feel like I AM THE BEST ! Every person needs to feel that, and that's what a lover is there for, to make his partner feel special, I have always fel that with you, but the problem is that you never worked on making me feel it.

I hope that all this is just a phase, and my own wish on your birthday is to see us living like every other couple, loving eachother, huggung, kissing, smiling at eachother, discussing our fruitful future, trying our best to make eachother feel special.

Good night .. and good luck my love .. i'lla lways be there beside you, so close that i am in you, in your very own heart.